Sassy Gay Friend
by Fuego Dragon
Summary: This is Haymitch Abernathy. He, is what we may call, A Sassy Gay friend.
1. Snow

This is Presadant Snow, he is about torture and kill rebels and innocent people. Many lives in Panem could have been saved, if he had a Sassy Gay friend…

"You must give up this poisonous dream, Snow" Katniss stood in front of the president, her eyes practically pleading with him to let her help. "Please many lifes could be saved if you stop the games" Plutarch agreed coming up behind Katniss

Snow narrowed his eyes and was about to snap back at the 'Mockingjay' when the whole world seemed to shift, and Katniss and Plutarch stood motionless in front of him.

The man blinked and waved a hand in front of the Rebel leader's face, trying to see if this was all just a game or a trick.

"What are you doing?"

Snow spun around and came face to face with another man, Long Beige hair ,dressed in black jeans, blue long-sleeve coat and a ridiculously bright orange scarf wrapped

around his neck.

"What, what, what are you doing?" He demanded again, pointing a long finger directly at Snow.

The Presedent was contemplating killing the fashionable man where he stood or just punching him in the face because his fist compelled him to, for some strange reason.

"I demand to know who you are." The president growled.

"No, no, the better question is why are you doing this?" The man asked, looking Snow up and down.

Snow bristled under the man's stare. "Because, otherwise The districs will-"

"Oh my God," the flamboyant man said and threw his arms up in the air. "You have got to get over the issues you have with the distric's uprising. It's getting old."

No one had ever dared talk to Snow this way in his life.

"We all get it, mister. You scare and kill others to make your self seem bigger. you want the districs to fear you, and because of sweet heart over here" the man said

slinging his arm around her shoulder "she is giving the district hope. well boo hoo, princess."

The man scolded. "And yes, we know you are sensitive too, because you cried more than I did when I went to see the Titanic in 3-D."

Snow stared at the man's scarf, carefully counting the ways he could kill the man with it, only to notice what he said. " we went to the titanic together?" he

questioned.

The man raised his eyebrows. " wait... Haymitch? District 12?" Haymitch smirked at him.

"And your work buddie over here here," the Haymitch said, circling Plutarch. "He's helped you and what do you do? Try to kill him. Now, here's what your gonna do,

your gonna write a poem in your little jornal and youre gonna move on. Because really, look at him." The man gestured at Plutarch's arms and torso. "If you won't go

home with him, maybe I will."

One could actually see the steam coming out of Snow's ears as the man spoke.

"If you don't go now and apoligise to the districts, you will be dragged out to the court yard in chains and witness a mob that wants to kill you, only to choke to

death on you own blood ?" Haymitch grinned. "Or maybe you'd like that."

The old man grew silent.

"I've got all day, Prez," Haymich taunted, crossed his arms, and twirled that stupid, orange scarf.

"Oh dear God," Snow's eyes widened and he jumped back over by Plutarch and Katniss.

"That's right," the Haymitch said. "go home to Mummy. And make sure to count to ten before you even think about trying to destroy another district you stupid bitch."

He blew Snow a kiss and took a swig from a glass bottle.

Time began flowing again. A few moments later, Peeta and Gale found Snow cradled in Plutarch's arms, with Katniss standing behind them awkwardly watching him sobbing

his eyes out and muttering something about orange scarves.

* * *

Yeah so, Haymitch is snows Sassy ... um... Read and Reply

-Fuego Dragon xxx


	2. Katniss

This Is Katniss Everdeen. She is about to kill herself. this fate could have

been avoided if she had a sassy Gay Friend.

This Is Katniss Everdeen. She is about to Drown herself. this fate could have

been avoided if she had a sassy Gay Friend Aka Haymich

* * *

"What are you doing? What, What, What are you doing?"

"Peeta Loves me no more"

"So we kill ourselves? Kill ourselves? No, heres what your gonna do. Your gonna go hunting for a bit, write a Poem in your little journal, and your gonna be the Mockingjay"

"Peeta has be rather hard to deal with lately"

"Sweet heart, he tried to kill both you and Finnick, and besides, this is the best your hair has ever looked"

"Yeah, I cant belive you were gonna get it wet. You, sweet heart, are a stupid girl"

xxxx


End file.
